I have demons in me.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
you inspire me to be a worse person
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
