you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Randomize
