You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
