spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
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