I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
