"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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