Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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