I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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