bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Randomize
