is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
