Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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