he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
