how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
