I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
