Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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