I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I'm way too hungover for life right now
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
