So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
