Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Randomize
