if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
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