Me too!
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
