if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Life is so much better after having sex.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
