I just pynch a tree in the face
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
