Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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