lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
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