the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
