I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
