whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
