the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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