I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Your mouth is God's brothel.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize