your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
