But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
