just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
