i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
