No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize