Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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