Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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