Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Randomize