i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Randomize
