she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
