Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize