I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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