You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
