redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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