her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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