Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
We had to coat check the pizza.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize
