do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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