I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize