She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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