I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize