yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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